a view through my own eyes

http://media.putfile.com/WizardsofWinter-SM

So George Best has passed away.

Its a tragedy that he effectively retired from football when he did at the age of 27. I suspect that he had hardly reached the height of his powers on the pitch and could have easily played for a good few years further in style rather than the dodgy comebacks through the 70s.

Instead; well we know what happened and how things worked out.

The irony I find is that he died he the day that extended licensing hours started, it seems somehow appropriate to be honest but then I admit I have a somewhat jaundiced view.

I wonder what they will put on his death certificate. On my mums (who struggled with alcoholism for years) it clearly says: alcohol related liver disease.

I wonder if the surgeons will be so honest with George or try and wrap it up in a new liver and say it was a consequence of the liver transplant?

Anyway: Farewell George say hello to my mum if you see her.

This morning got off with a great start.

The cat (Merlin) came in covered in sewage, absolutely covered in shit from head to toe. I really cannot put it any better than that. Before SWMBO & I had chance to catch him he ran round the downstairs of the house leaving a trail behind him and then ran back outside.

So at this point we start calling him from the front door I couldn’t chase after him any further as I had just come out of the shower and only had a towel round me (though SWMBO seems fairly sure that I didn’t have the towel). Anyway Merlin ran off and wasn’t coming back.

At this point since I would have to bath Merlin when he appeared SWMBO went to get the bus while I got dressed and washed the floor.

It didn’t take long to realise that I was going to be late for work, I didn’t want to leave Merlin outside as it was very cold and he was soaking (and stinking) so I sent the following email to work:

From: me
To: work
Subject: late in this morning - a bit pooey

I'm going to be late in this morning.

One of the cats seems to have managed to get into
a sewer, stomp liquid shit all round the house and
then run away again before Sam or I could shut the
cat flap.                                                                                                                                        

So once I have the floor clean (almost there),
recapture the feline in question (challenge no 1)
and give him a bath (challenge no 2 - it's gonna be
easier to remove the crap whilst it's wet than later
when it's dry and better for his health I expect); I
will be in.

If anyone has a suit of armour I could borrow for the
cat bathing then I would be VERY interested in
borrowing it.

Yours in disbelief.

Paul

The morning was spent washing the floor. I called him a couple of times and noticed out the back that the lid was off the compost bin – closer inspection revealed that Merlin hadn’t been in sewage as I feared but the compost bin instead, which having no lid currently was erm somewhat moist since the drainage for it clearly wasnt working. Looking inside you could see where he had been literally up to his neck in it.

So I waited patiently.

Come lunchtime he reappeared, so I grabbed him.

Got him pinned down in the bath and got him clean. Bizarrely he didn’t struggle, it was obvious he had been trying to get clean but didn’t do very well. He was absolutely caked in crap – I have never seen a cat in such a state – the only bit that was clean was his head – poor little sod. So he stood there and let me wash him. Lacking cat shampoo he had to make do with Head & Shoulders (back, knees and tail). At least he smelt better.

He spent the afternoon in a cat cage so he couldn’t go out and could dry off in the warmth of the house before taking him to the vets for a checkout in the evening.

So off the to vets we went.

He has an abscess and still smells slightly of crap.

Marvellous.

Still at least the vet said he would give him a good wash once he has been knocked out.

SWMBO found the following:

Your Birthdate: October 23

You’re not good at any one thing, and that’s the problem. You’re good at so much – you never know what to do. Change is in your blood, and you don’t stick to much for long. You are destined for a life of travel and fun. Your strength: Your likeability Your weakness: You never feel satisfied Your power color: Bright yellow Your power symbol: Asterisk Your power month: May

Sam has decided that it is so very true.

Perhaps I am doomed.
Perhaps not all webloggy gadget thingys are not total rubbish!

I have just found out that a large ladies bosom in Dutch is referred to as a “sweet shop”.

marvelous.

If anyone sees SWMBO could they tell her I would like some rhubarb and custards please?

Went to see Wallace & Gromit Curse of the Were-Rabbit last night, what a trully excellent film.

Highlight was leaving the cinema and SWMBO announcing that we needed to go to the carrot shop to buy some carrots.

Quick! Hide your vegetables.

I had a phone call yesterday from the eye consultants secretary asking whether I mind if the operation is not in Canterbury. I replied that I didn’t actually care where the operation is. So she asked if the Spencer Wing at Margate would be acceptable as they were having trouble getting a bed in Canterbury.

At this point I started feeling a tad excited, and just queried the situation since the consultant had told me that he does his NHS work at Canterbury. At which point the secretary told me that she had not been told that I was being done on the NHS and assumed that I would be getting it done on the private.

So I had to ask since they were asking if I minded travelling did they actually have an eye as I am fully aware that they have to get the cornea from the NHS eye bank.

The secretary then confirmed that they don’t have an eye yet and the current wait from initial consultation was up to five months. Fair enough thought I and asked since they did not yet have the necessary materials why on earth are they trying to sort out a bed so early. She did not know it seems.

Eventually I had to say, look: find an eye, a surgeon and an operating theatre then worry about the bed.

Oh well at least things are moving forwards in a peculiar way. I almost got quite excited for a minute.